Buxeraud Léna, Lebrec Romane & Lebon Lisa
Parenthood is a relatively complex issue in the context of placement. Support for parenthood is a key point of child protection. These parents have to be able to maintain their role without exercising 24/7 like regular parents. It indeed implies that, despite physical separation, the parent must not abdicate their responsibility and continue getting involved and accept to delegate. According to Sellenet (2007) it can be referred as “Part time parentality”and the consequences of this type of parenthood often lead to a deep narcissist wound of parental identity. How is that identity represented when a child is placed in a whole other family than their own? Based on what Euillet & Zaouche-Gaudron (2008), these parents experience a feeling of denigration and absolute pain, along with the feeling of being poor parenting. Indeed, parents with placed children might feel judged and evaluated in their parental identity and parenthood (Euillet, 2008). Parental identity is a part of parenthood; it corresponds to the way someone define, value and present themselves as a parent, to ourselves and to others.
The question may arise as to how the attachment relationships created in the family of origin are articulated with those built in foster families. The children’s background, at the time they arrive in the foster families, will guide the new attachment pattern. These adults often give up quickly when they don’t see any desire of attachment from the child. We know that the quality of the child’s attachment is an important area of child development (Bowlby, 1969). The main purpose of this new system is to enable the child to find or regain emotional security in their new living environment. In practice, professionals are very often confronted with the concerns of caregivers about the behaviour to adopt so that the child can regain this sense of security through a favourable relationship with this “professional” adult.
One of the missions these professionals may have is to assure parents of their essential and irreplaceable place with the child by taking care of the relationship between the child and their parent. Some research has shown that a family assistant who has a positive image of the parents when interacting with the child will positively influence their development (Euillet and Zaouche-Gaudron, 2007). Parent-child meetings during childcare are aimed to maintain the bond between the child and their parents. As a result, these visits, often referred to as “empty” visits, are questioned as to their true relevance to the child’s safety. On the other hand, the professional may become a real attachment figure for the child; they can develop multiple attachments. To meet the child emotional need for continuity and coherence, the family assistant must provide a sufficiently available and involved foster environment. This can show that one of the important missions that the therapist has in child protection may concern the support of family assistants in the development of the foster child’s attachment.
Key words
Parenthood = parentalité
“Part time parentality” = « parentalité partielle »
narcissist wound = blessure narcissique
denigration = dévalorisation
foster family = famille d’accueil
Bowlby, J. (1969/1982). Attachment and loss : Volume 1. Attachment. New-York : Basic Books.
Euillet, S. et Zaouche-Gaudron, C. (2008). Des parents en quête de parentalité. L’exemple des parents d’enfants accueillis à l’aide sociale à l’enfance. Sociétés et jeunesses en difficulté,5. http://sejed.revues.org/index2703.html
Sellenet, C. (2007). La parentalité décryptée : pertinence et dérives d’un concept. Paris : l’Harmattan