In the book « Emotional intelligence » written by Daniel Goleman, the author sustain the idea that emotional intelligence is equally important as rational intelligence, or even more important in our society. In this article I will speak about the part of the book which treats about the difference between optimism and pessimism.
Goleman says that being optimist or pessimist it’s an important element of emotional intelligence. This subject is interesting if we make the link with the neuroplasticity which is the capacity of our brain to reorganize it self by forming new connections between neurons. The way we think or perceive the world can change our brain organisation so in the same time our behaviour.
The author mention Seligman’s ideas about this topic. Seligman says that optimism can be learned and it manifests itself in the way that people explain their success and failure on their own.
A description of :
- Optimist person believes that failure is always due to something that can be modified in such a way as to succeed the next time.
- The pessimist blames his failure and attributes it to a personal trait of character that cannot be modified, and this influences his life.
Following a disappointment (failure to a job interview for example):
- Optimist reacts actively and confidently (for example, by building an action plan or seeking help and advice). For him a failure can always be overcome, corrected.
- Pessimist: reacts as if it is impossible for things to happen better next time, and so he does nothing to attack the problem. For these people, the personal deficiency caused the failure so they will never be able to succeed.
The level of success at school is also based on motivation. At the same level of intelligence, children can have different results. Success depends not only on talent but also on the ability to withstand failure. Optimism is considered a smart emotional attitude.
For example, Seligman did a study on insurance policy sellers. Optimists are better at this job. Working in this field is quite difficult, because each refusal represents a small defeat. The emotional reaction to this defeat determines the individual’s ability to find the courage to persevere. With the accumulation of refusals, the seller’s morale is likely to be affected – he will have more and more difficulty giving the next phone. The pessimist digests these failures more than he perceives them as personal failures (“I value nothing, I will never manage to sell something”) – and this interpretation is very likely to cause apathy and fatalism, even depression. Instead, the optimist will say « Something I am not doing well. » or « The last person I called was not in a good mood. », because they believe that the situation is responsible for their failure, not themselves. He will thus be able to modify their method to the next given phone call.
The mental attitude of the pessimist leads to despair, that of the optimist instead leads to hope.
In this book, Goleman says that the positive or negative disposition is part of the innate temperament, but the temperament can be tempered by experience. There is the possibility to learn to be optimistic and confident in the future, just as it can be learn to feel helpless and discouraged.
The personal efficiency is an important notion in this topic too. This is the belief that we are in control of the course of our lives and that we are able to overcome the obstacles that arise. By accumulating skills in a certain field, the feeling of personal efficiency strengthens: we accept more willingly to take risks and overcome more difficult obstacles and this increases the feeling of personal efficiency at the same time. This attitude allows people to better exploit their abilities or to do what they need to develop.
It is important not to compare ourselves with others and to think about our own evolution, development. Albert Bandura (a canadian psychologist) says that the way skills are perceived affects the skills themselves. A skill is not nailed, the performance varies considerably. People who have a feeling of personal efficiency recover quickly after their failures. They wonder how to regulate problems rather than worry about what might go wrong.
Words that I have learned : seek help (chercher de l’aide); refusal (refus); despair (désespoir); willingly (volontairement); nailed (coincé).