On 23 October, a conference was held in Nantes led by Gérard Neyrand on the subject of parenthood. The theme was “Supporting parents, it is discussed, it is disputed”. In this article, we propose a short report of this conference and we’ll try to make the link with psychology. Indeed, Neyrand is a sociologist and not a psychologist, but it allows us to clarify the context in which we live and show how our way of life can be impacted by these socio-historical changes.
Previously, the family was defined as a man and a woman having had a child by sexual intercourse, but today the family pattern is becoming more complex (Saint-André, Richard, Le Guen & Lazartigues, 2008). Neyrand draws a parallel between family change and evolving policies with, for example, the law of 1975 which allows divorce by mutual consent or the 2013 Marriage for All act. We have moved from a family institutionalized by the marriage to a family based on the arrival of a child and the empowerment of individuals.
Today, the child is a pillar in the family system and the question of raising children has also become a political issue. It is proved that parenting is fundamental to the child’s proper development ; this raised questions “what are good parents ?” and “how to practice good parenthood ?”. Thus, in 2010, a policy on parenthood was created.
This questioning on parenting leads to contradictions, a diversification of norms ; this can conduct to a loss of the parental marks. In the same way, the diversification of family models brings on parents to ask many questions about their parenting and to feel some stress to be “good parents”. Indeed, nowadays, the possibility of divorce and co-parenthood is added.
In France, for example, various structures have been set up to support parents. For example, we have the creation of day cares run by parents that actually involve both professionals and parents, allowing them to collaborate and provide parents with greater recognition and the possibility of institutional support. There are also child-parent homes that have a preventive purpose of separation disorders. Then, we have associations (e.g. Association of Collectives Children Parents Professionals), talking group, etc.
The management of parenthood by the State (we speak of “parentalism”) entails different risks.
First, there is a risk of over-responsabilization parents. This makes parents responsible and implies that parents need to be re-educated to be good educators. Indeed, it is considered that parental education explains the behavior of children or adolescents. For example, when a teenager commits an offense, we run the risk of blaming the parents. In doing so, we neglect the impact of the plurality of environments in which the child lives (e.g. social relations, living conditions).
In addition, there is a risk of naturalization of gender roles by not taking into account the new gender contract in our contemporary society (i.e. passage from paternal authority to parental authority).
Finally, there is the risk of reducing the parent to being only the bearer of an educational function (we see only the educator and no longer the individual in its own right), which can be difficult for the individual’s identity.
Parenthood support can be a valuable help for some parents to reassure and support their parenthood in terms of exercise, experience and practice (Houzel et al., 1999). However, let us be careful not to over-standardize the issue of education and not give all the wrongs to the parents. Reassure them, there is not one rule to good parental practice !
Words we have learned :
- parenthood – parenting : parentalité
- policies : politiques
- to raise : soulever
- empowerment : autonomisation
- raising children : l’éducation des enfants
- a day care run by parents : une crèche parentale
- to set up : mettre en place
- in doing so : en faisant cela
- bearer : porteur
- valuable help : aide précieuse
Maurane BLOTTIERE, Amandine CHARRIER, Tiphaine FRANÇOIS